Today’s Gratuitous Rant: coffee shops

WTF??? Are we STILL in this place? This place where coffee shops label their dark roast “strong” and, get this, this is a good one, the light roast option is a medium roast watered down.

I brought my cup back after one sip, my little face all scrunched up and confused, then got the explanation. The people around here don’t understand. They think a light roast means it’s weak, so the shop “has to do it that way”.

Cheeses H Cripes, seriously? How about don’t offer a fricking light roast if you don’t actually have one, and teach the locals about coffee if you do.

Coffee is special. It is nuanced, like wine. It has terroir and all the influences of the roaster and the brewer. Grind, water temperature, equipment, timing. Blah blah blah.

Look, I’m not saying everyone has to care about all that. I’m saying that if a shop doesn’t care about all that, just serve the damn coffee without pretending anything. Just tell it like it is.

By the way, they’re not beans, they’re seeds.

— end of transmission —

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