Category - Stories

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Big muscles v. big wasp
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Sleep and status
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Today’s Gratuitous Rant: coffee shops
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Close your eyes and bite down

Big muscles v. big wasp

“OMIGOD OMIGOD DUDE GET IT OFF ME!!!”

As I exited the campground washroom, a couple of 20-year-old-ish men were dancing around, screeching. One of them was holding out the fabric on the front of his tank top and the other one was screaming “Jesus, what IS THAT?” while swatting ineffectively at his friend.

The swatting friend had a piece of clothing in his hand and was too scared to come close enough to be accurate, so the floppy, swishing fabric did not dislodge the deadly monster.

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Sleep and status

This post has no picture. This post starts in the dark and ends in the dark.

I have a project underway. This minimalism project. My minimalism does not include paying large amounts of money simply to sleep.

My bicycle has a tent, sleeping bag and a comfy mattress. So my place to sleep has no door to lock. No walls, no heater, no AC. My place to sleep depends on the goodness of strangers, the weather, the sounds and smells of the world. If someone wanted me killed, raped or robbed, it would be fairly easy.

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Today’s Gratuitous Rant: coffee shops

WTF??? Are we STILL in this place? This place where coffee shops label their dark roast “strong” and, get this, this is a good one, the light roast option is a medium roast watered down.

I brought my cup back after one sip, my little face all scrunched up and confused, then got the explanation. The people around here don’t understand. They think a light roast means it’s weak, so the shop “has to do it that way”.

Cheeses H Cripes, seriously? How about don’t offer a fricking light roast if you don’t actually have one, and teach the locals about coffee if you do.

Coffee is special. It is nuanced, like wine. It has terroir and all the influences of the roaster and the brewer. Grind, water temperature, equipment, timing. Blah blah blah.

Look, I’m not saying everyone has to care about all that. I’m saying that if a shop doesn’t care about all that, just serve the damn coffee without pretending anything. Just tell it like it is.

By the way, they’re not beans, they’re seeds.

— end of transmission —

Close your eyes and bite down

A fresh-picked, tree-ripened nectarine, cold on a hot day, will make you feel that all is right with the world.

Close your eyes. If you decrease the dominating visual neurons (some researchers put sight at 83% of sense input), you can increase your perceptual range of taste, aroma and touch.

Bringing yourself into deep awareness of the senses is a break from the skittish, tiring human mind. It’s a small act of meditation. A small reminder that what’s real is the present moment, not your thoughts. And it feeeels gooooood.